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ds_workshopETA: This discussion will stay open until next Monday (Oct 17th), due to popular demand!
First, sorry for the delay with this! Router problems left me net-less for 3 whole days :( Now on to the summary!
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zebra363 didn't really believe RayV's attraction to RayK, saying that she needs convincing for this pairing, and that didn't quite happen here. She liked the short segments, but felt the transition to kissing was too abrupt, supporting china_shop's suspicion that she didn't linger enough for the tension to build. china_shop felt that relying on the readers' investment in a pairing is one of her weaknesses
zebra363 wondered about the sentence "Ray had liked Stevie, liked her a lot, which meant he’d never gotten to know her." She decided this meant there were things about Stevie RayV would have disliked if he'd gotten to know her, rather than implying that it isn't possible to like anyone you know well! china_shop said it was supposed to be about Ray not being in a position to trust anyone in Vegas, because opening himself up would be dangerous. zebra363 could see that interpretation, but thought the line "Ninety percent of the nice guys—and girls—in Vegas were cons" backed up her reading.
First, sorry for the delay with this! Router problems left me net-less for 3 whole days :( Now on to the summary!
zebra363 didn't really believe RayV's attraction to RayK, saying that she needs convincing for this pairing, and that didn't quite happen here. She liked the short segments, but felt the transition to kissing was too abrupt, supporting china_shop's suspicion that she didn't linger enough for the tension to build. china_shop felt that relying on the readers' investment in a pairing is one of her weaknesseszebra363 wondered about the sentence "Ray had liked Stevie, liked her a lot, which meant he’d never gotten to know her." She decided this meant there were things about Stevie RayV would have disliked if he'd gotten to know her, rather than implying that it isn't possible to like anyone you know well! china_shop said it was supposed to be about Ray not being in a position to trust anyone in Vegas, because opening himself up would be dangerous. zebra363 could see that interpretation, but thought the line "Ninety percent of the nice guys—and girls—in Vegas were cons" backed up her reading.
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Date: 2005-10-12 02:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-10-12 02:24 am (UTC)