This week's story: "April After All" by sprat

[sprat.livejournal.com]

I liked kindkit's approach to choosing a story to link here--it seems more useful to hear about possible flaws that I don't already see. This story's fairly recent, so it's pretty close to the way I write now. And though it's not my favourite of my own stories, I do like it quite a bit.

I guess I most want to hear about characterisation, especially Ray K.'s--I've always found his a tricky voice to get right. I'm also curious to know if the structure of the story worked--like, were there slow spots? Was there enough information to let you know what was going on?

The story is here: April After All

And this weeks moderator is gurrier, because she was nice enough to take my turn for me this week. She can be reached at gurrier@ comcast.net

Comments

[sprat.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much for commenting. The points you raised (it being late for Ray K to visit the Vecchios' and the slow bit with the janitor) were both notes China_shop raised in beta, iirc, so I guess I ought to have taken her advice there. :)

I was happy to hear that you liked this, and I appreciate your feedback.